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Penny Royalty

from We Are At Home In The Body by For Everest

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lyrics

You are quiet, you are silent on the way home, because your parents said something racist and you don’t call them anymore. Homemade videos where you bury yourself alive and keep your eyes shut tight.

You were patient, you were kind, you told me to take my time. But creeping doubt and sinking feelings couldn’t be just left behind. “I know,” “it’s not,” “you don’t need to justify,” this has been my whole life.

Do we always learn to live with what we can’t forget? And is that kindness?
I sleep with you in my bed while you dream of kissing gender-less kids. It’s just a matter of time before you leave or I’ll make you wish you had.

You are bright, I say you'll be fine, but mostly you don't feel a thing. And when question what you want, out of life and out of me, you say that neither is enough.

It’s just that i don’t want to think about who I am and the person I’d rather be. I trusted you and you tried to hide, but I knew it would never be alright.

You said you were born wrong, I love you desperately. I apologize, we’re not who we’re meant to be yet.

I am not what I lack, it's just a matter of time.

credits

from We Are At Home In The Body, released July 29, 2016

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